A 19th Sunday after Pentecost Thought a Better Way to Develop a Good Attitude

We're going to look at what may be a much better way to develop a good attitude. Whether you think you've already got a basically good attitude towards life and those around you or could use improvement, you can get a good boost from what we're about to read.

Warning: This will not be a course in positive thinking or any other "technique" that aims at changing our behavior that's typically pushed by the psychological manipulators amongst us. Instead, it's an interesting and thoroughly Catholic view that will, we hope, serve as an antidote for so much of the nonsense out there. 

If you've ever been subjected to it, you know what I mean. Oodles of books, videos, podcasts, etc. heap the stuff high. We're told that if we just think positively, all will be well. We'll realize our dreams. We'll finally succeed where once we failed. Our troubles will melt away; we'll be happy. We'll...well, you get the point, right?

The whole "self-help" world is rife with this stuff. Companies push it on sales people - and really any employee that might be instrumental in increasing revenue - to boost their sales. Companies I've worked for forced us to attend seminars run sometimes internally, but typically by hired consultants who harangued us with "motivating" techniques to fire up our desire to meet the company's sales and production goals. 

Now, none of this implies that we ought to be negative. That's not the answer. But being - more specfically feeling - positive all the time, in the face of any and all difficulty, without actually figuring out how to solve a problem, overcome and obstacle, etc. will get you nowhere. Maybe you'll feel better temporarily. Indeed, most sales meetings and conferences I've attended over the years did just that. They get you all pumped up to go out and conquer the world. You leave and within weeks, if not days, the positive pumping drug wears off and you're back where you were before the propaganda dump. You might even slip right back to the negative thinking and emotions that you thought would be expelled from your thoughts and feelings by these shenanigans perpetrated by the positive thinking gurus.

Okay, so what's our alternative?

First of all, cheerfulness has always been a good choice. Lots of saints were basically cheerful types. And not because that was necessarily their nature. Not being a saint, I can't exactly explain the connection between holiness and cheerfulness in any detail except to say there is one.

Does being cheerful mean you look at the brighter side of life? In a sense, yes. But that brighter side has to be grounded not in psychological manipulative bromides, but rather in reality, or, better the supernatural. The reality of God's Goodness, His Love, His Mercy can serve as some fundamental grounding here. The more you see that reality, the more you believe what you see, well, the more cheerfulness might take root in your thoughts, words, and behavior.

I'll leave it at that for now and turn to a fine Catholic spiritual writer for some specifics and nuance here. Father B.W. Maturin, born 1857, died 1915, will provide a good chunk of substance to my meandering introduction. Please do relax and take your time absorbing what a good Catholic spiritual director can provide to anyone willing and able: 

“It is in the light of our thoughts that we see and interpret the people and things around us. By a change of thoughts we change our view of life. It often seems to change the very people with whom we have to do. A feeling of resentment has sometimes the effect of apparently changing the expression of another’s face. And the same people look very different to the cynic and to the man of gentle and kindly feeling. It is undoubtedly true that the lines and shadows on the faces of those about us deepen or grow lighter under the changing thoughts within our own minds; we are astonished again and again to find how a person’s face grows more attractive, becomes sometimes wholly transformed as acquaintance kindles into friendship and friendship into affection. Even the tone of the voice, even the meanings of the words that are spoken, have a different sound and receive a different interpretation from the changing moods of the person who hears them. It sometimes seems impossible that some simple, kindly meant words should be misunderstood, but to the ears of one person the voice sounds insincere and the words receive the coloring and interpretation that comes from a mind filled with bitterness and antagonism. Surely there are not a few who look back upon misunderstandings, broken friendships, and some of the greatest mistakes in life, mistakes that it is now too late to rectify, and see clearly that the cause of them had no objective existence; it sprang wholly from their own subjective attitude of mind, which led to a false interpretation of words that were spoken and things that were done. Others who heard and saw and knew things as they were, sought in vain to explain, but it is the mind that sees, and the mind in its bitterness was out of tune with the world.

 “And so, again, a bad man sees evil everywhere and a good man sees the world radiant with goodness. ‘To the pure all things are pure, and to the impure nothing is pure, but even their own conscience and heart is defiled,’ and because of the defilement of the heart everything looks defiled. Two men go through the same streets, see the same scenes and people, yet the impression left upon the mind of each is different. The impression is the result of what their minds looked for.”

There's no staring at yourself in the mirror and repeating trite phrases about how wonderful you are, how, yes, you can do this or that, how everyday in every way you're getting better and better. Just solid Catholic wisdom understood through the ages and passed down to us fortunate readers by Father Maturin.

Isn't this a better way to develop a good attitude?

 Happy Sunday!