10/11 - The Right Way to Use Our Connections to Get a Job or Advance in Our Career

Today we consider what I believe to be the right way to use our connections to get a job or advance in our career. We'll combine personal experience with our next entry in the Rule of St. Benedict. Ideally, we'll easily see why the right way - as opposed to the wrong way - will lend itself to not only benefiting our personal situation, but also to supporting stability in the workplace.

So what's the issue here? We're looking at situations where a friend or other personal contact puts in a good word for us if we're looking for a new job, or desirous of advancement in our current situation. Let's start with looking for a new job.

Job seekers likely know that an introduction from a personal connection helps a lot in getting a foot in the door of a company offering a situation that seems to match what you're looking for. I've tried it both ways - cold and with that personal good word - and had some success with both. But the personal word does smooth the way compared to the alternative. So by all means, use your connections judiciously. Just don't rely exclusively on them. Then again, in our world of online job-seeking via Linked-In and other applications and software, the personal intro may not be so crucial. Still, it doesn't hurt.

As for advancing your cause within a company, consider the choice between staking your claim based simply on an excellent job review, vs. having a strong advocate a level or more up from your current humble station in the company. These don't have to be mutually exclusive, of course. Actually, combining them helps make a strong case for advancement. But without the helping hand of a "rabbi" in the company (Do they still use that term anymore?) you can still get ahead. Most of my jobs were sans rabbi. For whatever the reason. I managed. (Not that I'm a great example of getting ahead in the world of business, but I'm still plugging away and not starving.)

With either or both of these circumstances, though, you want to beware of using personal contacts in any sort of heavy-handed or otherwise untoward manner. If you're introduced by connection of yours, thank them sincerely and get on with the hiring process without trying to draw them in. Get on with it on your merits: your experience and skills. If you don't get the job, thank your connection again.

As for advancement helped along by a substantial employee (typically above your pay grade), never presume on their pull to drag you upwards. First, they may not like your presumption. Second, others will sense that you're getting ahead based on your connections rather than any merit. Do you really want to be seen in that light?

St. Benedict dealt with the equivalent situations that come up in monasteries. You can tell when you read this passage that he's had personal experience with the circumstances he describes.   

"If any man of good station offer his son to God in the monastery and the boy himself be still very young, let his parent draw up the petition...As regards his property, let them promise in the same document under oath that they will never of themselves, or through an intermediary, or in any way whatever, give him anything or provide him with the opportunity of possessing anything...so that the boy may have no expectations whereby (which God forbid) he might be deceived and ruined, as we have learnt by experience...."

Unrestrained undue influence will not only disrupt the community, but will also badly impact the individual soul who is of the object of that influence. As we've seen time and again, St. Benedict considers the situation from the perspective of the health of the community and the health of an individual's soul. He knows that any disruptive influence can undermine stability in his monastery. He knows that an individual given special consideration or privileges because of his connections will spiritually suffer in the long run.

In our own workplace, we should be able to see how those with connections, when these are not handled with prudence, will in some way "stain" the individual who's gotten help from some influential source. That being said, I have known cases where such an individual has zero concern for how others might view them, and is quite happy to take any advantage they can get to get ahead. But my experience has been that they've not added any special stitching to the cohesiveness, success, or stability of the workplace.

As for the effect on the individual's soul, that's between them and God, of course. But, like all social climbers out there, they typically aren't making fast friends on the way up. For the most part, many, if not most, fall into the category of the bigger they are the harder they fall. I've known more than my share.