On Friends and Wisdom in the Workplace

Today's thoughts should serve as an example of applying daily Scripture reading to our work. We'll focus on the two primary themes of friends and wisdom we find in Ecclesiatsicus 6 and apply them to the workplace.

Friends

The focus here is on real friends. Perhaps your experience differs from mine, but I've yet to gain a real friend from any of my relationships at work. Of course, co-workers may be good colleagues. Good colleagues cooperate during joint efforts, don't back bite or gossip, might even go the extra mile and lend a helping hand when you find yourself in a difficult spot. They can also be pleasant company during those company social gatherings - like Christmas parties - that one is compelled to attend. But that doesn't make them real friends.

We should be selective when it comes to considering someone a real friend. Personally, I've always been careful here, more the result of individual temperament or personality than any formal consideration. The result: I have few friends; but they're real friends. I know folks who enjoy the company of far more friends than I. And for a while I wondered whether I might be too particular here; maybe my standards were too high. But Ecclesiatsicus 6 cleared up my thinking here. The author rightly notes that we should be in some way "screening" an individual before we accept them as a true friend. Note also the various "categories" of friend here distinguished:

If thou wouldst get a friend try him before thou takest him, and do not credit him easily. For there is a friend for his own occasion, and he will not abide in the day of thy trouble. And there is a friend that turneth to enmity; and there is a friend that will disclose hatred and strife and reproaches. And there is a companion at the table, and he will not abide in the day of distress.

So we see here that the term "friend" can be used to describe many different sorts of relationships, most of which really don't qualify as a "real" friend. We might think of many of these relationships a "friendly." But a friendly relationship doesn't really yield a true friend.

This applies especially to relationships at work. Now, we might want to recognize that some people have met their spouses on the job. And I suppose, if you can find a spouse among your co-workers, you can also, in rare instances, find a true friend - maybe even two. You'll know it when you find them:

A friend if he continue steadfast, shall be to thee as thyself, and shall act with confidence among them of thy household...Separate thyself from thy enemies, and take heed of thy friends. A faithful friend is a strong defence: and he that hath found him, hath found a treasure. Nothing can be compared to a faithful friend and no weight of gold and silver is able to countervail the goodness of his fidelity.

Work consumes much of our time. As a consequence, some of us spend more time with co-workers than we do with our families. Given these circumstances, some people may tend to consider friendly, helpful co-workers as real friends - even in some instances as family. Indeed, many companies use the term "family" to describe their employees. I've always disliked that use of "family." Maybe it's a symptom of the breakdown of real families in our society. In many instances, it strikes me as manipulative way to garner some degree of loyalty from people who would be fired in a heartbeat if the bottom line called for it. Just remember that, most of the time, those folks are not your friends, never mind your family.

Count your blessings if you've got mostly friendly relationships with your co-workers. And when it comes to real friends, remember, in the words of Ecclesiatsicus, that you have "found a treasure."

Next time, we'll discuss the other theme in Ecclesiatsicus 6: wisdom.

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