What Happened to Lent?
(Originally posted March 29, 2012)
Every year it's the same. Lent begins with firm resolutions of increased prayer, sacrifice, and charity. And every year right around this time, as Holy Week arrives, I wonder what happened to Lent. Where did the time go?
Daily life just doesn't let up during Lent. Work consumes much of our time. The demands of our jobs continue without respite in spite of the fact that it's Lent. Family life - both the blessed time we spend with our loved ones as well as the chores and crises that come with family life - continues to call for our attention.
I wish somehow there was some sort of "extra" time to observe Lent - like an hour a day that got added on to the usual 24, just so I could be faithful to my commitments to prayer, sacrifice and charity.
I remember once thinking that it must be easier for a monk, secluded behind the walls of a monastery, to observe Lent. But that's probably silly. Monks have a lot to do. Prayer and work take up their waking hours. No one gives them "extra" time for special Lenten commitments. Maybe monks feel the same way when they notice that Lent has rushed by.
Worker, husband, father, monk - you either make the time or you don't. You either say those prayers, make those sacrifices, perform charitable works or you don't. In my case, I always seem to fall short.
Is all lost? Do I enter Holy Week with my head hanging down, despondent that I couldn't fully live up to my promises to God? Do I just ignore this Lenten deficit and rely on the Good God's mercy and forgiveness and do my best to observe this holiest week of the year wholeheartedly and with fervent attention?
Usually, it's somewhere in between. It starts with the hanging head (although - Deo Gratias - the despondent feelings of old are mostly behind me). Then the goodness of God, His love for me, becomes clear and present when I give the slightest thought to exactly what Holy Week is all about. The simple thought of Jesus suffering and dying just so I could be saved sinks in. My heart becomes lighter, my mind clearer. Yes, I can and I will immerse myself as much as possible in the letter and spirit of this Holy Week.
And yes, I know that the demands of work and family life will not lighten up just to accommodate my good intentions. Yes, I know that when the great Easter Triduum arrives, I will just barely find the time to attend Holy Thursday Mass, Good Friday services and, finally the glorious Easter Sunday Mass.
But that's life, isn't it? It's not supposed to be easy. When things are sloppy and don't go just how you planned or wanted them to go, it's just God letting you know that you control far less than you'd like. It's not so much that you've failed, or that you're lazy, or that you're weak, or that you don't care enough. It's that you're simply a human being who was born with Original Sin, whose Baptism washed away Original Sin, but whose heart and soul still suffer the consequences of that Original Sin. The daily struggle that results from Original Sin - our struggle to do good and avoid evil - permeates our lives and will always do so, no matter the season: Lent, Easter, Ordinary Time, Advent, Christmas.
All of a sudden, I realize that there were those moments during Lent when my prayer brought me closer to God. There were those unexpected moments when I behaved in a charitable way (usually in spite of myself). Those discreet moments came because God brought them to me, in His own way and in His own time.
As for my plans, they may not have panned out just as I wanted, but that's really not the point. What I wanted when Lent began doesn't matter now.
Every year it's the same. Lent begins with firm resolutions of increased prayer, sacrifice, and charity. And every year right around this time, as Holy Week arrives, I wonder what happened to Lent. Where did the time go?
Daily life just doesn't let up during Lent. Work consumes much of our time. The demands of our jobs continue without respite in spite of the fact that it's Lent. Family life - both the blessed time we spend with our loved ones as well as the chores and crises that come with family life - continues to call for our attention.
I wish somehow there was some sort of "extra" time to observe Lent - like an hour a day that got added on to the usual 24, just so I could be faithful to my commitments to prayer, sacrifice and charity.
I remember once thinking that it must be easier for a monk, secluded behind the walls of a monastery, to observe Lent. But that's probably silly. Monks have a lot to do. Prayer and work take up their waking hours. No one gives them "extra" time for special Lenten commitments. Maybe monks feel the same way when they notice that Lent has rushed by.
Worker, husband, father, monk - you either make the time or you don't. You either say those prayers, make those sacrifices, perform charitable works or you don't. In my case, I always seem to fall short.
Is all lost? Do I enter Holy Week with my head hanging down, despondent that I couldn't fully live up to my promises to God? Do I just ignore this Lenten deficit and rely on the Good God's mercy and forgiveness and do my best to observe this holiest week of the year wholeheartedly and with fervent attention?
Usually, it's somewhere in between. It starts with the hanging head (although - Deo Gratias - the despondent feelings of old are mostly behind me). Then the goodness of God, His love for me, becomes clear and present when I give the slightest thought to exactly what Holy Week is all about. The simple thought of Jesus suffering and dying just so I could be saved sinks in. My heart becomes lighter, my mind clearer. Yes, I can and I will immerse myself as much as possible in the letter and spirit of this Holy Week.
And yes, I know that the demands of work and family life will not lighten up just to accommodate my good intentions. Yes, I know that when the great Easter Triduum arrives, I will just barely find the time to attend Holy Thursday Mass, Good Friday services and, finally the glorious Easter Sunday Mass.
But that's life, isn't it? It's not supposed to be easy. When things are sloppy and don't go just how you planned or wanted them to go, it's just God letting you know that you control far less than you'd like. It's not so much that you've failed, or that you're lazy, or that you're weak, or that you don't care enough. It's that you're simply a human being who was born with Original Sin, whose Baptism washed away Original Sin, but whose heart and soul still suffer the consequences of that Original Sin. The daily struggle that results from Original Sin - our struggle to do good and avoid evil - permeates our lives and will always do so, no matter the season: Lent, Easter, Ordinary Time, Advent, Christmas.
All of a sudden, I realize that there were those moments during Lent when my prayer brought me closer to God. There were those unexpected moments when I behaved in a charitable way (usually in spite of myself). Those discreet moments came because God brought them to me, in His own way and in His own time.
As for my plans, they may not have panned out just as I wanted, but that's really not the point. What I wanted when Lent began doesn't matter now.
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